Photohunt Saturday - Thankful

These hands are those of the two most important people in my life; my Mother and my best friend. I am beyond thankful for them both. They love me and support me and care for me with their loving hands!

I don't mean to be flip, but I am a true chocoholic. I prefer dark chocolate, but I 'll take it anyway it comes. I am thankful that I am able to enjoy chocolate!

An Ode To Public Libraries

We are all faced with trying to find ways to cut back on our non-essential spending during these difficult economic times. Since I love to read I have had to be more careful about purchasing books, magazine subscriptions and other media items like DVD's. OF course I am a HUGE fan of the public library, and am blessed to live where we have a terrific selection of items at our library. This is my number one source for all of the above. The nice thing about the library is you can try new authors, new genres and movies you might not have seen otherwise because they are free. If you don't like them, you haven't lost anything. I have discovered some great authors simply by browsing the shelves of the local library. I have also found TV shows that I didn't watch when they were on, that have now been released on DVD, and discovered some real gems that way. I encourage you to make your local library a regular part of your life.

Another wonderful thing I have found at my library are the free programs they offer. They have everything you can imagine - from classes and lectures on every theme imaginable to live music and plays. Most of these are completely free, and if there is a charge it is usually very nominal, a few bucks at most. You can learn how to make jewelry, all about another culture, see a Shakespeare Comedy or listen to Do-Wop music under the stars! If you have little ones, just about every library offers a "story time" for the kiddos - a great way to get them interested in books and reading, even before they are old enough to actually read!

Reference Librarians are another great resource of your membership. They can help answer questions on a variety of subjects and point you in the right direction for finding information on whatever you might be interested in. When I first started blogging, my local reference librarian was able to find many books not only blogging, but also on the social networking sites, like Facebook, MySpace and Twitter. Any books they didn't have at my branch were simply ordered from another branch and sent to me. He even had some ideas for books that I would never have thought of, many of which have helped me a lot.

Lastly, our library system offers free passes to some of the major museums in our area. Because I live just outside NYC, that means I can get into many of the major museums in the country, like The Museum of Natural History, The Museum of Modern Art, and The Metropolitan Museum of Art. With the cost of admission for a family easily reaching over $100, this is a big savings and a cultural goldmine. Check with your local library to see what types of passes they might offer for local cultural attractions nearby.

The best part of all this is the library card, completely free, and in the words of a certain credit card commercial we all know, "PRICELESS" !

Pain Blog Carnival Is Up!

February's issue of the Pain-Blog carnival is up at How to Cope With Pain. Please check out all the great entries this month!

Wordless Wednesday - Baby It's Cold Outside

Can anyone tell me what kind of tree this is? It is so unique without its foliage and I don't know what it is. Thanks!!

My first "adult" snow angel - it was a blast, just like I remembered it!

All of these shots were taken on a snowy day in my neighborhood.

Life Lessons Part 4

"Being loved is not just about giving, it is also about receiving"
-- Anne Hathaway

SECRET # 4

In order to love others, you must first love yourself!

• The picture of the bee and the flower above reminds me of the symbiotic relationship of love. Just as the bee needs the flower for its pollen to make honey, so the flower needs the bee to pollinate and spread the growth of the flower. Each one needs the other and also offers the other something in return for what it takes.

• We've all heard the example of the parent flying with a child and the oxygen mask. In the case of a sudden loss of cabin pressure the parent is advised to place their air mask on first, before placing one on the child. This is because the parent needs to be alert and able to help the child, and if they aren't receiving oxygen and lose consciousness, neither the child or the parent has much chance to survive. The child depends on the parent to do the right thing in caring for him. It is really the same with ourselves, though I think those of us with chronic illness sometimes have a hard time seeing it that way - we must first take care of ourselves before we will be able to take care of those we love who depend on us. Sounds very much like 'In order to love others, you must first love yourself' and it leads me back to the quote from above, 'Being loved is not just about giving , it is also about receiving'. Why do we find it so easy to give our love, our time and our precious energy, but we find it so hard to accept that same love, time or energy from others? Worse still, why do we think needing help (or love) makes us weak?

• At the end of the last lesson I asked you to think about the people and things in your life that make you feel good, I called them your lifelines. I talked about the fact that we all need to feel needed and useful. I want you to create a list of people and of things, whether they are actual items, hobbies, activities or interests that make you feel good, needed and useful. After you have created this list I want you to start finding ways to incorporate these people and things into your life every single day. It doesn't have to be the same person or thing each day, it doesn't have to be for a large block of time, but it has to happen each day.

• One thing I learned about myself is that since I no longer am able to work I was having a hard time feeling needed, I felt I lacked purpose. I started to volunteer at a local Alzheimer's respite program one day a week for about 4 hours. I LOVED it, and it gave me a sense of purpose, made me realize that I could still help others and filled my spirit. It also took me out of myself and my own problems, my pain and fatigue. Eventually, as my health deteriorated I was unable to keep volunteering because I wasn't able to make it on a regular basis. Instead of feeling defeated or useless, I found another way to make a difference. I contacted a charity and asked what type of help I might be able to provide from home. They were in need of someone to collate and stuff mailings for them. While it isn't fulfilling in the same way, I am doing something that helps others and at the same time I am getting myself out of my own head for awhile. This is just an example, it doesn't have to be volunteer work, it can be a hobby - I like scrapbooking and photography. When I feel particularly bad I enjoy taking out a scrapbook of vacations I have taken or friends and family and looking through it. It reminds me that I DO have better days, I have people who love me and I have had experiences that I enjoy. This gives me power over my illness because I refuse to let it define me, even when I am in a flare and unable to do much of anything.

• Are you starting to make the connection between loving yourself first before you can give love to others? If I don't allow myself these things I get the feeling that I can't do anything anymore, that I am not worth loving. When I make time to allow myself to see how special I am, I realize that I deserve to be loved. Then I am able to ask for help, if I need to, or simply to enjoy a friends company because I know I am worthy. Because I do this on a regular basis I am able to be loving and supportive with my friends and family. I am not running around on empty with nothing left to give to others, because I fill up daily by loving myself first. It isn't about being selfish, it is about realizing that I matter enough to take care of myself. We looked at making a self - care plan in the first lesson, but that dealt with more practical things like laundry, cooking, shopping and house cleaning. This type of plan deals with things that are equally important but tend to get pushed to the back burner.

Also in this series:

Life Lessons Secret #1 - Never Forget Who You Are And Never Let Illness Define It!
Life Lessons Secret #2 - Prepare And Implement A Self-Care Plan!
Life Lessons Secret #3 - Be Honest And Gentle With Yourself!

Saturday Photo Hunt - Warm #150

What could be warmer than day spent at the beach? All the pictures above are from Fire Island Beach and Sunken Forest this past summer.

PhotoHunt

I'm a Sexy Superhero!

I went to Daryl's site and had to go create my own alter ego at this site. I always knew I would make a kick ass superhero, I just didn't realize how sexy I would be - Chronic Illness look out, you've met your match at last!

http://www.cpbintegrated.com/theherofactory/ http://onthem104.blogspot.com/