Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Back From Break

WOW, it has been awhile since I last posted. I wish I could say I was away for the holidays, but in truth things haven't been too well with me. I needed to take a break for health and personal reasons.

Those of you with chronic illness will understand. By it's very nature it flares up when it feels like it and there isn't always a lot that can be done other than wait it out. This time it really got to me emotionally. I was in a real blue funk for awhile and just didn't feel like posting when I felt like that. But, talking with a good friend made me realize that I needed to post, because that is the truth of being chronically ill. Not all times are good, we can't always think our way to happier times, and I would be being dishonest not to admit that I go to that place sometimes too. I write a lot about gratitude and self care, and I fully believe in both and practice them regularly, but I am not immune to bad times.

However, I am beginning to feel better, emotionally at least, and wanted to get back into the swing of things. I miss posting on Wordless Wednesday and Photo Hunt Saturdays and plan to get back to those this week or next.

I did have some fun over the holidays including:

  • A day trip into NYC to look at the Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree and skating rink as well some of the store window displays. It was SO crowded the day we went in that it wasn't as much fun as I had hoped, but because I am a former city gal, I made a go of it anyway, taking my mother and friend on a tour of Grand Central Station, The Ford Foundation and Tutor City. Grand Central Station had a holiday laser light show on the ceiling in the main room that was a nice surprise treat.
  • For my birthday a friend got us tickets to see "Oliver" at the John W. Engeman theater in Northport. The cast are all equity actors, so it really was Broadway caliber and we enjoyed it immensely. We went out to dinner after to celebrate my turning 42.
  • I visited Old Bethpage Village Restoration for a "candle-light walk" with my upstairs neighbor and my mom. It is a village with original houses from the 1700 and 1800's and they had people in period costume at each location. They also had a huge outdoor bonfire, sing-a-longs, music on 18th century violins, as well as hot cider and cookies. It was a nice evening and luckily the weather cooperated.
  • Local trips to see Christmas lights in the area. The neighborhood we live in really does it up right, and it was nice to walk (when weather and health permitted) or drive by, and see all the different displays.
  • Midnight Mass on Christmas complete with the choir singing before for an hour - the highlight of my holiday for sure!
  • Going to Hick's Nursery to see the Christmas displays and watching all the children ooh and aah over the animatronics display. They also had a brass quartet playing Christmas carols and gave bells to the little ones to play along. There is nothing as much fun as seeing Christmas through the eyes of a child.
  • Going to see the tree and skating rink at Rexcorp in Uniondale at night.
  • Spending time at my friends house after the holidays enjoying her family, good food and lots of laughs.

I talked in my last post about needing to take a break from doctors appointments. Unfortunately my break is over and I have been going to doctor's each day. I have so many things going on, so many tests happening at once, plus my mother to tend to so the days are full once again with that. I have had two appointments (yesterday and today) with new specialists who listened and are taking seriously some of the things that have been wrong for awhile now. It gives me hope. I am changing from the internist I had been seeing, who I had written I was so unhappy with, back to one I had seen years ago whom I had liked. I am hopeful this will lead to a better handling of my overall health situation.

My girlfriend talked me into signing up for a yoga class at our local recreation center. I have to be very careful because I hyper extend easily and injure myself, but I am going to give it a try. I won't be able to do what everyone else can, but I will do what I can.

I don't believe in New Year's resolutions. I try my best throughout the year to take care of myself and improve in ways I can. Each time I fall down, I pick myself up and try again and that's good enough for me. I find the pressure of resolutions usually makes me fail, but just aiming to improve my health or outlook is more manageable, for me anyway.

I will post some photos of some of the fun stuff in the next day or so. I appreciate everyone who visits and reads my blog and the patience you show when I am away for an extended period of time. I hope that everyone had a good holiday season and that the New Year is starting off on a good note. I know the holidays are always a mixed bag for me. The religious part and the spirit of Christmas that brings out the best in others always makes me happy, but at the same time I also feel a sadness for those who aren't here. Let's just say I am happy to be in January and especially past my birthday.

Speaking of birthdays, I know I will get some heat for this, but I want your comments so I am bringing this on myself. . . when did we stop sending paper cards or calling someone for their birthday and begin thinking it is okay to e-mail or send just an e-card? I was offended at how many people took this way out. If it was a money issue, I would be understanding, but those that did it weren't the ones who are struggling financially. Am I the only one who thinks that a card or call is still in order?

Thanks again for allowing me to be real here, even when the reality isn't pretty. It helps to know that there are others who struggle and get through the bad times too. Blogging and meeting so many great people through it, has been a huge blessing. Well, I have rambled enough for one post - see ya again soon.

7 comments:

maria said...

So glad to see you back - sorry to hear about the doctor visits, though. Take things easy - you're a brave (and admirable) soul to try out yoga. I want to, but too chicken! ;)

As for the getting real about reaching out via cards vs. email, I have to agree. I miss being around people, but will take whatever I can get from them. Hopefully, with life becoming as economically and emotionally difficult for many these days, re-connecting personally might make a comeback...it sure has my vote.

Sending you a smile today~

Daisy said...

From Daisy's mom:
I'm sorry you have not been doing well, but it's good to learn that you are starting to feel better. I take a yoga class twice a week and it's the very best thing I do all week. The feeling of well-being after the class can't be beat. It doesn't matter how much or how little you can do, it's just the taking time for yourself.

Mojo said...

Speaking of birthdays is right! How come I didn't get the memo? 'Cause you know I'm all about the birthday hungama. I'd have had the elves chained to the ovens until they came up with a suitable cake.

So anyway, happy belated birthday... wish I'd known. (I still don't send hardcopy cards, but I'd have done something embarrassing anyway.)

Renee said...

Hi Maureen
You have been in my thoughts and prayers ~ i figured you must not be doing very well if you were not posting for any period of time.
Yes, reality is, there are times we just get into a funk. Must have something to do with being incredibly human, huh??
I am so glad that you are doing better and finding medical support.
I am a person who loves to write letters and cards..my favorite thing is to order cards after Christmas on Dayspring's big clearance online... anyway, I am scribbling here.....
I agree that we have taken a different route in many respects with ecards :(. People are soooooo "busy" and it is so easy to do this..sadly, email has often replaced a good phone conversation too!
I do agree with you on the ecard business although I use them myself at times.
Gentle Hugs
Renee

Shauna said...

Maureen,

How ironic that I myself was just about to post, for the first time also since my last one on Christmas!! Pain got the best of me, and also, personal reasons.

The pain and resulting exhaustion is so deep, with that follows the inevitable depression, which is when I should post, but just can't, feeling that all I will do is waaaaaa waaaaa, and I never want to do that.

I am so glad that you have gone back to a doctor that you liked, and feel that they are treating you better in many ways. That is so important. I wish you a day, a week, of low pain, feeling better, and always, Gentle Hugs.

Shauna :-)

Connie said...

I've missed you so much. It's good to have you back. Good to hear that you've been busy and done some fun things. It's OK to let us know that you're not doing well either. As you can see, many people care about you.

I'm terrible about sending birthday cards. I do call or send e-cards, except for my closest family members. I know that's terrible, but I just don't know how or why I got into the habit.

A belated Happy Birthday! When was it? Take care and I'm hoping and praying that the doctors find out what is wrong soon.

Prof Sherlock said...

Just discovered your blog today. I hear you about doctor visits. About once or twice a year I'll go maybe 4-5 weeks without a single doctor visit. Then it seems like I'm in a doc's office every day of the week for a month. Well not quite but close.

Our family has an ongoing (for years) contest to see who can find the funniest birthday card. If we're lucky, everyone can get together for dinner and share the cards. And we always do phone calls when we can't get together.

Happy birthday to you :-) I'm looking forward to reading your blog in 2009. Visit me sometime on my blog (I just started it this week!).
Sherlock